Que sera, sera

- “But you said you deleted my emails”. (He said with a laugh)
- “That was a mistake wallahi!”.. (A moment of silence) “mm.. I was spring cleaning messages that I didn’t want to see again.. and yours -among others- were deleted accidentally. After I noticed, undo didn’t work.”
- “You deleted them?! not even archive?!” (astonished)
- “Yes, not even archive. I deleted them..” (she confirmed.)

بردت قهوتنا

عبير نعمة
شربل روحانا
جاد الحق
~ قهوة

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ماجاني منك مرسال .. يسأل عني بهاك البرد
يطمن كيف الأحوال .. كيف الشتوية بها لجرد
حتى لما داب التلج .. رَجعت الركوة عالنار

Today’s quote

“It is a truth universally acknowledged that when one part of your life starts going okay, another falls spectacularly to pieces. ”

~Bridget Jones’s Diary

Will our paths cross?

Hope we get a chance to cross paths again some day too.”.. That’s how the email ended, and that’s how I started wondering again about the strangers I meet and the paths I walk by everyday..

To where the roads will lead me, whom will I meet again, and whom not?.. and who will remember me when I am gone?..

Nostalgic?.. True, a little bit..

بلا ولا شي

لم أحضر الحفل، لكني غنيت اليوم مع زياد رحباني فى هدوء.. وإستمتعت

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بلا و لا شي بحبك بلا و لا شي
و لا في بها الحب مصاري و لا ممكن في ليرات
و لا ممكن في أراضي و لا في مجوهرات
تعي نقعد بالفى مش لحدا هالفي
حبيني و فكري شوى
بلا و لا شي وحدك بلا و لا شي
بلا كل انواع تيابك بلا كل شي فيه تزين
بلا كل أصحابي اصحابك الثؤلى و المهضومين
تعي…
بلا جوئة امك بيك و رموش و مسكرا
بلا مالنسوان تحيك بلا كل هالمسخرة
تعي…
بلا و لا شي

To my parents and grandfather

While the piano man was playing “Kalemat” today, I remembered the first time I heard this song. I was a kid watching Magda El Rumi’s live concert on TV – with my parents at night. My father is the one who taught me poetry. He taught me to love good words, and to seek the hidden meaning behind any song. Both of us share the love of almost the same singers and poems, and share many memories singing together Farid El Atrash songs in a duet..

My mother taught me how to taste music. She taught me to appreciate fine arts, all forms of arts. Good novels, architecture, nature and Om kalthoum. She says I remind her with her father – my grandfather. He was a painter. He was a very good painter actually, who used to listen to radio every day at night while painting. She told me that she knew Beethoven, Tchaikovsky, and Korsakov through listening to my grandfather’s radio playing in the other room. I used to draw too – before I stopped. I drink coffee like him while working, I listen to radio everyday at night, I wish to tour the globe one day like him, and I dream to have a library, as big as his library.. before they sold the old house..

I am still living with my parents, but my grandfather died long time ago. I barely remember his face, though I can still feel his hands tapping on my shoulders, when I used to call him “Dodo” with 3-year-old-voice…
These memories seem so far away now..
And although they may be no one, no one at all to you.. I am proud to be a fresh copy for the three of them.

ماجدة الرومي
نزار قباني
كلمات ~

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Daily News Egypt: ElBaradei inspires change

~ Daily News Egypt
Published on 3rd of March 2010

By the end of his live interview with “Al-Ashera Masa’an” talk show host Mona El-Shazli a little over a week ago, the official Facebook group supporting Dr Mohamed ElBaradei for presidency in 2011 had shot up from around 40,000 to 71,000 members. Less than a day later, it went up to 86,000.

Roughly 40 million Egyptians watched this interview, and the massive effect it had on youth is undeniable. After almost three decades under the same president, Egyptians are in dire need of change. ElBaradei embodies that change. Through him, change can happen if (and only if) everybody works with him. Suddenly it feels that Egypt is no longer owned by a single ruling party and its governing elites.

Most of comments on ElBaradei’s Facebook group are by Egyptians both inside and outside Egypt, expressing support for ElBaradei or trying to find creative ways to spread his vision to the off-line community. The rapid increase in the number of comments is incredible, and can only be compared to the April 6 Facebook group that called for a day of civil disobedience in 2008.

What’s different this time is that the campaign is more mature, with important variables in the equation. Here we have a highly respected symbol to rally around, supported by intellectuals mobilizing a serious campaign despite the stagnant political climate. For the first time in many decades, Egyptians of various orientations are gathering around one person.

ElBaradei’s focus on youth was shrewd because it’s their support he needs the most. In the interview he scored points when he mentioned that he follows their work on YouTube and Facebook, and that he sympathized with the two young men who were temporarily detained while preparing for his welcome. He also apologized for not being able to give a speech immediately after his return as planned, all of which deepened the feeling of respect towards him.

While some compared ElBaradei to US President Barack Obama, others compared him to Mahatma Gandhi or Egyptian nationalist leader Saad Zaghloul. However, some are skeptical, especially that he declared that he is not after the presidency and that he will not set up a new political party. Many of the criticism directed towards him revolved around these points, as well as the fact that he has lived almost half of his life abroad, raising questions over his familiarity with the current situation in Egypt.

ElBaradei is only calling for constitutional reform to guarantee that any capable Egyptian would have an equal opportunity to run in the elections, isn’t this what everybody else is calling for?

But despite the fact that free and fair elections are the pillars of a true democracy, calling for them remains risky.

One can never measure the success of a campaign by the number of members joining a Facebook group. Egyptians are known for being an emotional nation, yet there have been no popular uprisings in Egypt since 1977 against raised bread prices.

ElBaradei highlighted this apathy in the TV interview, when he said that after years of living under a dictatorship, Egyptians can no longer make the connection between their deteriorating social conditions and the need for real political reform, which is the real challenge.

His words have set the wheels of change in motion with loud and determined voices appearing in the independent media, and Egyptians everywhere, on the streets, in offices and buses discussing the possibilities of change.

To keep the momentum of what ElBaradei has started, the following points need to be addressed: First there is a need for proper organization for those who want to help but have no idea how to do so. Joining a Facebook group is only the first step, it can’t be the last; otherwise they will continue to remain as scattered and random as previous groups.

Second, ElBaradei must start presenting a specific vision. Naturally it’s too soon to ask him for an electoral program, but he still needs to make his vision clear in people’s minds. He needs to answer the urgent question: “What are the steps he will take to change the constitution?”

Third, the most trusted intellectuals have to show their full support for ElBaradei and through their networks, they will help him spread his message to a wider base of Egyptians.

I will conclude with the words of political scientist Hassan Nafa’a in an article commenting on the popular reception of ElBaradei at the airport two weeks ago.

“Yesterday at Cairo Airport I saw Egypt voting for a new third way … aiming for complete democratization based on citizenship and separation of powers, transparency and the rule of law… a democratic system which allows anybody, whatever their status, to practice their rights. Basically the freedom to vote for whoever they want under judicial supervision.

“And because those movements found in Dr ElBaradei the right person to lead the much needed transition period to make this system reachable, they decided to receive him at the airport, hoping that he will march them towards democracy.

“Does Dr ElBaradei understand the difficulty of the mission which fate set out for him? And the other question is: Is he capable to handle this mission? This is what time will answer, but I think that we should all give him a hand. Are we ready?”

When a piano man plays..

Today I asked the piano man to play me this musical piece by Omar Khairat. When I heard him playing it the other day, I suddenly found tears coming to my eyes. It is so special. It brings back nostalgia for memories I have not lived yet. It makes me miss my home, my room, my lamb light, my books, my daily arguments with my mother and brother, my father’s smile, 10 PM program, my radio, Om Kalthoum’s daily slot, my pen and notebook.. It makes me miss life. Life at large – future, past and present..

The music is cheerfully sad, and it tells a whole lot of stuff and things enclosed inside each and everyone of us.. When a piano man plays..

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Omar Khairat
~ Don’t lose your mind

سعادة مؤقتة

في اليوم الأول لي ببيروت، كسرتُ المظلة التي أعطتني إياها والدتى لتحميني من المطر. فى الأيام التالية إشتدت زخاته بصورة ملحوظة، فبحثُ عن مظلة أخرى أشتريها من شارع الحمرا عوضاً عن الفائتة؛ لكن لم أستطع العثور على غيرها لأن المحلات تُغلق هناك مبكراً. مبكراً جدا مقارنة بمواعيد القاهرة. وبصراحة كنت أشعر بسعادة أكبر هكذا وأنا أمشي كل ليلة تحت المطر على كورنيش البحر. حرية ونشوة أفتقدهما بالقاهرة..
فى اليوم الأخير لي قُبيل السفر، وجدتُ مظلتي أخيراً. وعندها توقف المطر..

ولما عدتُ، أعطيت أمى المظلة الجديدة فقالت أنها ستكون مطمئنة أكثر لو إحتفظتُ بها لتحميني من شتاء القاهرة. منذ ذلك الحين وهى معى في حقيبتى الصغيرة، لكنها لم تمطر أبداً إلا اليوم – عندما غرقت الشوارع بفعل مطرٍ عنيف وكرات ثلجية صغيرة. بحثتُ داخل حقيبتى ولم أجد المظلة. وبصراحة كنت أشعر بسعادة أكبر هكذا. الناس كانت تجري أمامي، وتدعوني للإحتماء معهم تحت البنايات فى الشارع، فكنتُ أرد طلبهم برفضٍ لطيف ثم أضحك لنفسي جداً.. كنتُ الوحيدة التي تمشى وسط الشارع الغارق بالماء ورأسي مرفوعة لأعلى. بللتُ جميع ملابسى وأتلفتُ بعض الحاجيات التى كانت معى بالحقيبة. ولم أهتم. فقط كنتُ سعيدة – سعيدة ربما أكثر مما ينبغى. وماكان ينقصني إلا صحبة مجنونة تقرر مشاركتي سعادة ولو مؤقتة..

Shopping alone, so what?

Because I hate shopping, I used to postpone each time till the next time – and usually next time never comes. Almost all my friends are shopaholic, they love to do shopping day and night – and that’s enough for a nightmare. There is always “sale” somewhere they’ll go to and call it a good bargain. Frankly, I tend not to understand what is so good about buying a new shoe every other week? Why not buy a shoe when you need a shoe – that’s it?!

I’ve tried every possible way to make shopping seem fun. I tried going to fancy places and below average ones, with my parents and sometimes with my friends. But all experiences were the same. Shopping is lame..

However because today I had to do some urgent shopping, and no one was free to join, so I had to do it for the first time alone. And although I didn’t buy most of the things on my list, I didn’t mourn it as usual. In fact, I enjoyed shopping for the first time.
That was the most interesting thing that happened today!

I didn’t have someone bugging me with advices to look here or there, I headed directly to my favourite shops, tried the things that caught my eyes – then left. And while walking, I spent quality time at a library for used books, whereas I always crave for doing so and can’t because the one with me always doesn’t want to take a look. I also searched for a gift I want to buy for a friend, while drinking my favourite sugar cane juice. And lastly, I ate my favourite shawerma sandwich, not because I was hungry, but because I wanted to – despite my hatred to the stares!

Actually eating in the street today was something that made me think about the changes that recently happened to me. Few months ago, I would have never did it.. I would have never ever liked [Ar] to eat a sandwich alone and in the street, even if I am dying out of hunger. To me, that’s simply the ultimate example of lonesome.

But today I enjoyed acting as an independent free woman. Shopping alone is fun. I even feel I am ready now to head the first fancy restaurant and eat dinner or lunch alone. I don’t mind anymore. I also believe I am ready to take my coming adventure.. alone..

مونولوج – أهون عليك

محمد عبد الوهاب
محمد يونس القاضي
مونولوج – مقام كورد
1928
أهون عليك ~

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كان عهدى عهدك فى الهوى
يا نعيش سوا يا نموت سوا
أحلام وطارت فى الهوا
تركت مريض من غير دوا
ليه ضاع الوفا

قابلته و يا ريتنى ما قابلته

محمد عبد الوهاب
مأمون الشناوي
~ قابلته

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مهما جرى لى و مهما يجرى
فى قلبى دايما أمل فى بكرة

عشرون عاما و أنا أبحثُ عن أرضٍ وعن هوية

أم كلثوم
نزار قباني
محمد عبد الوهاب
~ أصبح عندي الآن بندقية

أصبح عندي الآن بندقية
إلى فلسطين خذوني معكم
إلى ربى حزينة كوجه مجدلية
إلى القباب الخضر .. و الحجارة النبية
عشرون عاما و أنا أبحثُ عن أرضٍ وعن هوية
أبحث عن بيتي الذي هناك
عن وطني المحاط بالأسلاك
أبحث عن طفولتي وعن رفاق حارتي
عن كتبي .. عن صوري ..
عن كل ركن دافئ ..وكل مزهرية ..
إلى فلسطين خذوني معكم
يا أيها الرجال
أريد أن أعيش أو أموت كالرجال

أصبح عندي الآن بندقية
قولوا .. لمن يسأل عن قضيتي
بارودتي .. صارت هي قضيتي ..

Wishlist before I die

As I was checking the 3rd item on my 2010-resolutions today, I thought I should start writing down my 101-things-to-do-before-I-die list.. It’s always good to keep track of your dreams :-)

1. Plant Tulips in my balcony.
2. Build my own library.
3. Visit Iran (For the Islamic Architecture, and visit Omar El Khayyam’s grave).
4. Visit Spain (Al Andalus to put it right, specifically Alhambra).
5. Visit Turkey.
6. Visit Morocco.
7. Visit UK.
8. Visit Russia in the middle of their winter!
9. Re-visit Lebanon to see the mountains properly.
10. Tour the rest of the world.
11. Buy DSLR.
12. Do proper photography.
13. Learn how to play Oud.
14. Learn how to play Qanoun.
15. Study Media.
16. Work with BBC.
17. Attend a concert for Marcel Khalife.
18. Attend a concert for Omar Khayrat.
19. Work as radio announcer.
20. Meet someone who would surprise me with violet Tulips (without reading this).
21. Live at least a week in the desert.
22. Learn to cook as a professional chief.
23. Visit Syria.
24. Visit Japan.
25. Make a real snowman.
26. Parachute..
27. Visit India (specifically Taj Mahal).
..
..
101. ??

So tell me, what is your 101 list of things before you die?

Day dreaming of Egypt I know

On the day Mohamed ElBaradei, the former head of the International Atomic Energy Agency, returned Egypt to join forces working on democracy in the country…

On the day hundreds of spontaneous Egyptian youth, who have nothing to do with politics, queued up at Cairo International Airport to welcome ElBaradei home, and ask him to run in next year’s presidential elections…

On the day some Egyptian writers, actors, politicians and media figures,  finally went down to the street with people and honestly joined their enthusiasm and dream..

On the day little glimpse of hope sparked in the hearts of many…

I would like to day dream and compare #ElBaradei 2011 to #Obama 2009.. Let’s dream that change can happen..

Yes we can!

Hello stranger..

I returned back home walking again tonight after work, and on my mind was still yesterday’s thoughts. I was thinking about the strangers I meet everyday in my life. How many of them will drop in the middle of the road, who will stay as strangers as they are, and who will continue with me the path of life..

So, Hello stranger.. where are you?!

At peace with the world

Tonight I left the bus and went back home walking; and throughout the way, my last visit to Beirut was on my mind. I remembered the first night I spent walking with strangers in the streets. It was my first time to travel somewhere new and spend it with people I barely know. I was frightened. But then the other night I walked alone, I wasn’t as frightened as expected. The streets of Beirut were cozy and familiar, and I felt free.. free as I never felt before..

I always love walking and loved it more when I was taken away in a new place with new faces. Some in-comprehended beauty was added to the atmosphere, as I was re-discovering myself..

Today, I was at peace with the world. And as I am about to travel again, I wonder if I will have the same chance. I wonder if I can keep walking till I find my way back home..

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Was humming this piece of music by Marcel Khalife throughout the streets of Cairo. The one embedded here is not a complete version. I’ve trimmed it to the parts I love the most..
~ Popular Caf